Tag Archives: joke

Weirdest Items Ever Listed on Yahoo Japan Auction

Since Yahoo Japan Auction started in 1999, the service has grown into the biggest, most successful auction site in Japan. Sometimes you find great items, but  occasionally you encounter weirdest things you’ve never expected to see. I’ve selected a few examples of oddity every found on YJ Auction!

nantaimori

Nyotaimori is “often referred to as “body sushi,” is the practice of serving sashimi or sushi from the body of women, typically naked (Wikipedia)”. However, this seller has offered himself to be Nantaimori,  which is a male version of it. In the auction description, the seller states it’s perfect for occasions such as “when you have no dishware at home,” “to show apology to clients when you made a mistake in business,” or “to create romantic atmosphere at dinner with a girl you are proposing to,” and so on. Um…yeah…is there an insurance policy for when it actually destroys your date?

earthauction

Well, it’s the planet we live on. In the Q&A section, the seller answered to questions like:

Q “How is the quality of the item?”
A “It’s been 3 hundred million years, but I think it could function another 5 hundred million years. Unfortunately the terrain and environment have changed from its original condition…”

Q “Is it size L?”
A “The size is S. There are many bigger planets out there.”

The auction started with 69JPY and eventually got terminated early by the seller with 9,999,999,999JPY with no highest bidder.

freezashoes

It’s actually a legitimate product designed and sold by a brand called “nice to meet you,” but you’ve got to wonder, where do I wear these shoes to? They look really awesome as an art project though.

1monthsalary

This guy must be a real masochist to be willing to let random people decide what to do with his money! (Or maybe he’s secretly super rich?) The seller would do almost anything, with the exception of making profit for the won bidder (such as handing all salary to the bidder), or for illegal actions. The auction ended with 25,000 JPY.

idiotproofauction 

It sounds like the tale of “The Emperor’s New Clothes.” Supposedly, this item cannot be seen by ignorant people. The seller explained, “it’s embarrassing, but I cannot see it either.” Although he offered to give away a couple of Denny’s and Yoshinoya coupons as freebie to the highest bidder, no one purchased this item.

yamato-keitruck

The seller calls it “Space Kei Truck,” vaguely resembling to Reiji Matsumoto’s popular manga/anime Space Battleship Yamato. It’s actually a functioning kei truck.

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Space Kei Truck behind the scene photo, in process of making.

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Got stopped by police while test driving.
Police: “Where do you think you are going? Iscandar?”

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Suspicious interior of the space truck…

wallpunching

In crowded cities of Japan, not everyone has privilege to punch walls whenever they get angry (they are too nice to their neighbors). You could break your fist if you punch random walls without practice too, you can’t risk that! To solve such problem, the seller auctioned a service to punch walls on behalf of you. It was sold for 100JPY per punch, and total of 9 punches were sold.

poopcatching

One of those weird Japanese random inventions. You can catch dog poop and pee directly in this handy plastic purse. Japanese people put so much effort in making smallest part of their life easier and more efficient, which is great! However, the dog probably feels embarrassed by this photo going up on internet.

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Evidently this guy was going through very difficult time. To try to cope with the situation, he produced a bunch of Japanese calligraphy pieces of “Orz,” a Japanese emoticon showing a man on his hands and knees struck by failure and disappointment. Calligraphy pieces were written on A4-size photocopy paper and framed. No one bid on it, which probably didn’t help his feelings.

20090204-1

This adorable penguin is a pet of this auction seller. His name is “Penguin Ouji (Prince).” You get to own a foot print of Penguin Ouji and a day of hanging out with him, feeding him, taking a walk with him!

penguin2

The auction ended with 12,725 JPY. I hope the bidder enjoyed a date with Penguin Ouji!

timemachine

 

The title of the auction stated it was a “real time machine” (Makes me think of the movie I recently watched Safety Not Guaranteed.) The seller explained that he spent 20 million JPY to invent it and runs on regular 100V electric outlet. This was also Yahoo Japan Auction’s most expensively bid item ever in its history, which was 10 trillion JPY. WOW. Eventually, the Auction staff found out about it and forced to terminate the listing with no highest bidder.

 

Even from auctions, you can see Japanese people have twisted sense of humor! A lot of the time these weird items show up on Neta (Joke) category of YJ Auction (not always, but often). Please remember listings in this category are not always legitimate, so browse it with your own judgement!